But wait a moment—often there are several ways that God’s one way may be carried out.

“What are you talking about? How can there be both one and several—both at the same time?”

Well, there can often be several ways of accomplishing (or failing to accomplish) God’s one way.

“How about a ‘for instance?’ I don’t get it.”

OK. Try this on for size: You are to tell the truth, but you may do so in a variety of ways. God says, for instance, tell the truth IN LOVE?  You know, telling the truth may be done lovingly or harsh, thoughtlessly—in ways that make the truth a hindrance to communication rather than a help. Is it still the same truth when spoken in these two distinct ways?

“Truth is truth, isn’t it?”

Yes.

“Then how could it be anything else but truth—even when spoken harshly?”

Consider this: Suppose you want another to know that you care about him/her? So you say, “I want you to know what I think about you . . . ,” and that’s as far as you get before the other person interrupts and says, “and I want you to know what I think about you,” and he begins to tell you off! Then the truth that you were about to speak (“I think you are a caring person”) may never surface, and a wrong idea emerges instead. Thus the truth is attempted, but failed to be heard.

“Guess there can easily be such misunderstandings.”

Sure can—and believe me they abound. So, be sure the truth really comes across, or you may try to speak truth and, instead, communicate something else—even the opposite!

Check out our online courses, including, Introduction to Nouthetic Counseling and  The Use of Scripture in Counseling, taught by Jay Adams!

Books related to counseling others:

1. Competent to Counsel by Jay Adams
2. The Christian Counselor’s Manual by Jay Adams
3. How to Help People Change by Jay Adams
4. Check out our Bookstore for all the best counseling books!

The Christian Counselor’s New Testament and Proverbs, translated by Jay Adams

Visit our online bookstore for all your biblical counseling resource needs.
For more biblical counseling training, check out our list of INS Online Courses.

Follow INS on Social Media:
– Facebook: noutheticstudies
– Twitter: @noutheticstud
– Instagram: @noutheticstudies

The post There Are Other Ways appeared first on Institute for Nouthetic Studies | Biblical Counseling.

“Can you give me a for instance?”

Sure. Ever hear people say “Now that was a miracle!” or ‘The devil made me do it,” or . . . well, you name it.

“Yeah. I’ve heard both. The first sounds OK, but the second I have doubts about.”

You should have doubts—as a matter of fact, you should reject both as unbiblical statements.

“Really? Why?”

Because they are unbiblical.

“How about the devil made me do it? It seems like an excuse—that’s why I’m doubtful.”

It usually is just that whenever someone says so. But, it’s more important to understand that it’s wrong because it’s unbiblical. In I John 5:18 we are told that the Evil One cannot even “touch” a believer, let alone make him think or do something. He can tempt, put obstacles in your way, and so on; but he does all of this by means of his people—who are all around you. Now, they may have no ideas of his plans, and, may act unwittingly about what they are doing; nevertheless, if he’s working through them, they can become a roadblock or a temptation to you without even knowing it. Jesus once told some of such people “You are of your father the Devil, and you want to carry out your father’s desires” (John 8:44).

“Wow! That’s quite a statement. Should probably encourage people to be careful in talking about believers a having been made to do something by the Devil. If it were true, they’d probably not really be Christians after all. Of course, they probably are using the expression carelessly.”

Right.

“What about that miracle thing?”

Well, there’s a lot of eschatology connected with the answer that I can’t go into here, but you can read about it in my book, The Big Umbrella. Let me at least say here that people are not careful to distinguish a work of God’s providence from a miracle. God is at work in His world—He’s no Deistic God, Who, having made the universe, walked off, never to have much to do with it again. No, Romans 8:28,29 refutes any such idea. But the difference between a miracle—which was used to authentic someone doing something special for God (Cf, Acts 2:22) and a work of providence is something else.

“Hmmm.”

Got it?

“’Fraid so. Guess I’ll just have to change my speech.”

The post Be Aware! appeared first on Institute for Nouthetic Studies | Biblical Counseling.

Now, that really isn’t an answer, though he used it as such. He meant, of course, “Sure, let’s do so.” But there is always something about those two words, used in that manner, that makes me uneasy. They cause me to wonder whether there is a full commitment on the part of the one uttering them.

Indirect answers such as this can get people off the hook if, when considered in the light of a subsequent problem, the persons making them refer to the fact that they never really said “Yes.” Now, Phil never used the phrase that way, or ever tried to back out of something he agreed to by calling attention to the fact that he never gave me a positive response. With him it simply had become a habitual, common expression. And, I confess, I’ve caught myself using it as well. It was just the uneasiness that it conjured up that made it a problem (a slight problem) for me.

Of course, there are people who will give you equivocal answers. Often on letters (or forms) of recommendation, you know that this is what happens. “You won’t believe how good a worker John is.” Or, “I can recommend him in the worst way!” are two facetious examples of what I’m talking about. Christians must make every attempt, when counseling or teaching biblical truth to be unequivocal. There is no place for fudging in Christianity. God is explicit; He is clear; He is emphatic! So should we be in presenting His truth.

“Are you sure that this is the thing to do?”

Why not?

The post Why Not? appeared first on Institute for Nouthetic Studies | Biblical Counseling.